Christmas Reflection: Everything has a crack in it.

Dear Helen, on Christmas morning.

So we stuck with no gift giving outside of our immediate family. BUT We are not bound by rules... and so when our son in Europe found himself travelling alone, we shared the cost of a contiki tour. And when we heard that our niece, who lives overseas, is back in Australia with her sister - we bought a ticket for our daughter to fly over to see her cousins - so the girls can be together again, the first time in YEARS. And no we are not cashed up, but we don't buy the latest cars, or buy into the idea that we need the latest gadgets, and yes our house needs repairs. And our eldest son came home unexpectedly (and leaves today on Boxing Day) - so we put together a pamper pack of all the worst food possible (not for me! Urgh) to take back with him (he is working on the wheat bins during his uni holidays). 

Our greatest gift to our extended family was the wonderful, cruelty free lunch prepared by our teenage daughter. When we arrived at the garden at her grandparents apartment block, we found my father extremely stressed because the rest of the family wasn't there on time. He was worried about his blood pressure, and looked small and elderly (something I often forget) - and I wanted to say - this is not what Christmas is about. My father - who had been to church just a short time before, was upset about the trivial,on this remembrance day of the birth of his saviour... and so when the rest of the family arrived it felt strained. AND yet - the love my daughter had put into the food - vegan, mostly gluten free, and the grace with which she offered it to her family, calmed the atmosphere. This is what Christmas is about. 

Riva and I had sat together as our priest Helen had shared a story about how everything has a crack. And as she sent us off with a blessing she said, "And may the God of love bring messengers of light to shine love through the cracks in your life today." And so he did. 

And Helen gave me a gift... a holding cross carved by artisans from a single piece of wood pruned from the very olive wood trees that have scattered the landscape around Bethlehem, the birthplace of Jesus. And a handmade card with a very meaningful and personal message. Dear Helen - a messenger of light shining love through the cracks in my life.  

Asta xxxx

Like a snail I carry my one warm room with me and yet something is missing.

May you find harmony between your soul and your life...
(from John O'Donohue's prayer For Belonging)

Here is a picture of our new/old lounge room. Anyone who knows our 'warm room' will recognise it. We've taken it with us where ever we've gone - like a snail carries her home on her back. (I love snails.) It's a room where there is no need for 'any mask of pretense or image' (words borrowed from the new home blessing I shared in the last post).

I have loved reconnecting with very dear old friends, and I have even had one new friend visit, and yet I feel a little off centre. Lonely, but not alone. I can't really pin down exactly what it is, but I know that I'm not quite right. I can't paint. I'm totally blocked. I couldn't even go to church last Sunday - because I just wanted to go back to my church in the country. I could fight these feelings but I sense I just need to sit with them. Sitting shiva with my grieving self. (Sitting shiva is a Jewish custom where you sit alongside someone who is grieving, possibly in silence.)

I have never reacted quite like this before. I wonder if it is the sudden and unexpected change. It is as though, in my hasty move, part of my soul is still on its journey  here. Perhaps I just  need to wait until it catches up.

Half of my family is still in the country. One of my sons will join us in a few days. And my husband in a few weeks. I know that will help.

Meanwhile my warm room will shelter my heart. My daily practises of prayer and journal writing will ground me. Silence will still me. My family, friends and pets will sit with me. I trust that soon my soul and my life will be in alignment and harmony will be restored.

Peace be within you my friends,

Asta x

Rachael Jamieson Newton

Rachael Jamieson Newton

'Instead of deciding all the things that are right and wrong with the world and what everybody else should be doing, the Lord spoke to me about going deeper in the simple things.' - Rachael  

Meet Rachael - a valuable member of The Simply Living Challenge Facebook page community.

Welcome Rachael. It is just lovely to have you here. Let's get straight into it. How would you describe yourself in 5 words?

   

Loyal, Open-minded, Funny, Bossy and Visionary 

Please introduce us to your family.

My husband is Ben - he is a wonderful and interesting man. We've been married for 12 years in September. We have two utterly fabulous children. William, who has just turned 6, is kind and clever and curious and soft-hearted. Scarlett is 3, and is a fascinating little person. Determined yet soft, savvy, hilarious and strong. I see both Ben and I in both of them. I'm also one of 5 daughters (the second eldest, like Elizabeth Bennett!) and I've married into a wonderful extended family.

What do you see as your priorities? How does that play out in your life?

I definitely feel grounded in my conviction that my life is a gift from God, and that His purposes should be mine. I've always felt tension by having both an incredible maternal desire and a sense of calling and ambition about my career (teaching, and educational leadership). I have no desire to combine these as a home-schooler, so God has very kindly given me great peace about the seasons in life! Right now, my focus is on raising our children. I don't want this time of having young children to be spent wishing I could be somewhere else. I want to see this "simply" - to be present, to deal with the things that come up today, to teach them as they ask specific questions, to use moments in time like tiny building blocks. Some part-time teaching (and an inspired list of ideas to do when I have my own class again someday) keep my priorities clear. Over the last few years God has really taught me that when I am faithful with what's in my hands, He provides great opportunities to serve Him. It's been an exciting, and simplifying mindset!

Would you call yourself a simple liver? How does your life reflect that?

I would call myself a "dabbler," someone still very much learning about Simple Living. The idea appeals very much to my husband, who is naturally frugal and not at all materialistic. It's harder for me. I have a strong conviction of stewardship over the environment as a Christian (it staggers me that for many Christians this seems like a foreign idea), and I am being challenged very much about the notion of things I "need". Ben and I are very mindful of the message that having loads of "stuff" sends to our children. We have a veggie garden, and we're looking for our next home with top priorities being room for vegies, an orchard and chooks (though I confess hens terrify me.) I've found myself making small changes and there's a new voice in the back of my head which says "Do you really need that?"

I have that same voice speaking to me Rachael. It is all too easy to get needs and wants confused. 

Who inspires you? Perhaps you could share with us who set you off on this path.

This path started spiritually for me. I have been dwelling very much on the notion that Christians spend a lot of wasted head space bothering ourselves with doctrine and theology I refer to as "God's Business". Instead of deciding all the things that are right and wrong with the world and what everybody else should be doing, the Lord spoke to me about going deeper in the simple things. At the moment I'm meditating on "Love Thy Neighbour". If I spend a lifetime getting that entrenched in my heart, I think I will be a "good and faithful servant". So that spiritual walk has of course affected the natural, and so I am challenged to see that outworked. 

This on-line community is inspiring (though family toilet towels will NEVER be a part of my life - we'll stick to recycled paper). I recently made a jewellery hangers from an array of sticks I found, instead of buying the pretty French-inspired manaquin I wanted. Ben is very proud of that, although worried he'll lose an eye on the way to the loo in the middle of the night. I've also started shopping at a farm shop in our area, with local fruits and vegetables. I've also ventured more into op shops, not writing them off as comical places to find costumes for 70's parties (I saw some great stuff last time). Small steps.....

That's wise Rachael. I have the feeling that if we start with small steps whatever we do is more likely to be sustainable. 

Would you say you have a tribe who support you in your choice of life style? Who are they?

My closest friends would definitely share in some of these ideals and support all I do. My church community may think I'm slightly mild or left-of-centre (most would support some version of prosperity doctrine), but I'm sure others would share some of these ideas. I've always wanted a patchwork experience of Christianity - a broad blanket which connects with all kinds of believers who live a life for Christ the best way they know how. My husband and I very deliberately want this for our children too. This online community is an important patch on that quilt.

Oh I like that!

August's challenge is speech/ words. Last week I touched on honesty. Could you comment on the saying ‘Honesty is the best policy’?

Surely the opposite of simple is complicated. Being honest usually simplifies things. We all know how we can end in a tangled and complicated mess when lies are told. Having said that, "Honesty is the best policy" doesn't mean saying whatever is in your head, true or not. Surely the best policy is to love your neighbour as yourself - I would want the truth told to me when it will help or enlighten or challenge me, and I would want people to quietly say nothing and love me anyway when their "honest" view would cause me hurt or harm.

Do you have some favourite books you could share with us? 

Favourite books of all-time are the Anne of Green Gables series. I have read the whole series every year since I was about 13. They have changed my life. I generally prefer fiction and some favourites are the Diana Gabaldon books, "The God of Small Things", anything by Jodi Picoult, "The Eagle and the Raven" and "The Long Ships" (thanks Dad for those) and a good splash of classics.  

What are you reading right now?

Anne of Avonlea (my run started late this year) and a fascinating novel called "Day for Night" by Frederick Reiken. I've also read "Jac of Hearts", a novel for young people that a teacher friend of mine wrote. I'm also stuck in 1 Corinthians 13 - going deep in the 'love' chapter.

What are you passionate about?

My family - I think of my children and my heart skips a beat. My friends. Traveling - I combined Italy and my best friend earlier this year and it was food for the soul (and belly). I am absolutely passionate about children - seeing them learn and develop a life-long love of learning, and find their own personal walk with God. All things education. Art. Living my life with an undoubted sense of purpose. Seeing others find this too.

What do you hope for? Dream of?

I hope that my children walk with God. I hope that the children I teach do this too. I hope that my mother finds peace in her life, and my sisters too. I dream of children growing up (especially mine) and telling me that I helped them find God and to walk a purposeful path in life. I hope that in all the busyness of life (which I like) I truly do learn to go deeper in the simple things, and live a life that gives rather than takes away from others. 

What can we learn from you? (or if you prefer – what have you learnt?)

Apart from some handy literacy tips? How to tackle long multiplication? As far as Simply Living goes, I am an absolute beginner. I guess across my lifetime though, I've learned through many (often difficult times) to be content. Surely that's at the heart of Simply Living. 

Yes Rachael, I think you have touched on something important there. 

What is one of your biggest simple living challenges?

Retrieving eggs from hens will be a biggy! Also changing entrenched ideas about "needs and wants". 

You are a valuable contributor on The Simply Living Challenge. What appeals to you about the page? How can we support you?

It is so encouraging to see and hear how people live. How people have taken on a sense of conviction, and are faithfully going about living out that conviction in their own day to day lives. I love the focus each month. In small ways, sometimes just in my spirit and my head, I am challenged and changing. Thank you for that. 

Anything else you want to share?

Just again - thank you. Oh, and tips on keeping chooks without having to go near them much? 

Okay Community - any ideas on the hen problem?

 Thanks Rachael for taking the time to do the interview and for sharing something about your version of simple living. Personally I am going to spend some time today thinking about what you had to say about 'needs'. - Asta x

As always comments are encouraged. I just love to see the conversation continue. 

Afternoon tea with simple liver Renee Mellor.

Renee Mellor

"What can you learn from me? That you can do more than you ever thought possible. I never thought I would be milking a goat, or canning tomatoes, or starting 600 vegetable plants from seed, but I did all of those things this year. Open your mind to the possibilities and see what happens."- Renee Mellor

With us today is Renee, who has the loveliest smile - wouldn't you agree? She smiles with her eyes. She has been part of the Simple Living Challenge community now for quite some time and her contributions and encouragements have obviously not escaped my notice. Thank you Renee. So let the conversation begin...

How would you describe yourself in 5 words? Hmm, this is hard because I try not to label myself too much, but I'll try. I'm passionate, stubborn, messy, complicated, and determined.

5 words that others might use? This one's easy. Loving, stubborn, bossy, opinionated, and fun.

We'd love to meet your family. Please introduce them to us. I've been married to my amazing husband for 15 years now, he's a great husband and an even better father. I have an 11-year-old son, Gabriel, who is moderately autistic. He has challenged me to be more patient and worry less about what people think. I have twins that will be 10 next week. Ian is mildly autistic and he's an amazingly smart and literal kid. He's taught me that it's important to do what you say you're going to do, when you say you're going to do it. Aislyn is a beautiful, smart, happy girl, who has a huge joy for life and finds such joy in the simple things in life. Lily, my baby, just turned 4 and is in that stage where she wants to do exactly what Mommy does. Nothing makes her happier than picking tomatoes in the garden or collecting eggs from the hens. 

What would you say are your priorities in life? To raise, healthy, happy, well-adjusted kids who know that people are more important than things, and that easy isn't always best. Some of the most important things in life take hard work. They have to do chores, they have to help with the animals and the garden, they have to be respectful and polite whenever possible. I'm teaching them right from wrong, in a society that doesn't seem to care anymore about right and wrong. I hope I'm teaching them to question things and not believe everything that society tells them is important. I want them to thrive, no matter what they choose to do.

What does Daily Bread mean to you, if anything?  Even as a Pagan I understand that this means so much more than food to eat. I'd say, for me, it's having the things we need. That's NEED, not want. I'm getting better every day at figuring out the difference. We need good food, clean air, clean water, and the company of the people we love. I'm lucky to have everything I need right now.

 How does your life reflect your simple living philosophy?  I think a big part of simple living is to separate ourselves from the "consumer" mindset. Having more things doesn't make you happier, it just makes you in debt and surrounded by a bunch of stuff that you could easily do without. It doesn't matter if your neighbour has a bigger house, a newer car, nicer clothes. 

 Also, I think that it's important to be as self-reliant as possible. We raise rabbits and ducks for meat, we have a flock of laying hens and a couple of dairy goats. We've got a big garden and we're putting in fruit trees as the budget allows. All of these things allow us (or will in the future) to stop spending so much money, which will allow my husband to work less.

Who inspires you? My grandpa, who plants his garden every year. My grandma, who recycles and composts and makes the most amazing soups out of leftovers. My mom, who lost everything she owned in a fire last year and rebuilt, and got on with the business of living. My husband, who supports me, no matter what crazy idea I come up with. My children, who need me to be a good example.

 What are your favourite books?I'm just assuming you are a reader... Oh, this is really hard, as reading has always been one of my favourite ways to escape stress. For informational purposes, I love Back to Basics, The Foxfire Book, and Mini-Farming: Self Sufficiency on 1/4 Acre. For pure entertainment almost any book will do but my favourites are the Outlander series, by Diana Gabaldon, the Black Dagger Brotherhood series, by J.R. Ward, and the In Death series by J.D. Robb. I like a series because they let get deeper into the characters than a stand-alone book would.

So what is on your bedside table at the moment? An Echo in the Bone by Diana Gabaldon, A Lick of Frost by Laurell K. Hamilton, and Building Green by Clarke Snell and Tim Callahan. Yes, I'm one of those crazy people who have multiple books going at once.

That is me too Renee. I have trouble getting in and out of bed because I have to navigate my way around my big pile! 

What are your biggest passions? My husband, my children, my family. I'm also passionate about real food, growing it, cooking it, eating it, and making people understand that it's vitally important to know what you're eating and how it's going to affect you in the future.

Your hopes and dreams? I hope my children grow up to be exceptional people. I see their potential and I'm so excited to see who and what they will become. 

 I dream of, one day, being able to produce all of our own food here on our dream property.

 I hope I see the day that society realizes that it's not important what you have, it's important WHO you are.

What can we learn from you? What can you learn from me? That you can do more than you ever thought possible. I never thought I would be milking a goat, or canning tomatoes, or starting 600 vegetable plants from seed, but I did all of those things this year. Open your mind to the possibilities and see what happens.

That is a big encouragement to me Renee - I am a simple liver without a productive garden and I would love to do more in that area. Sometimes it just seems beyond me. 

What would you say your biggest challenge is?  My biggest challenge right now is letting go of my negativity. I so often feel like I'm the only one who sees how out of whack the world is. I need to remember that there are others who understand and are doing something to change things.

You are not alone!  I suspect this might be why you like The Simply Living Challenge, Renee - and the simple living community in general. Am I right? Yes! It connects me with like-minded people. We may not agree on everything, but we agree that change needs to happen and we're all working on it in our own way. It's so refreshing to talk to people who care about more than the latest TV show, or the hottest new trend, or the latest celebrity scandal. I get so many great ideas from so many people in so many places. 

How can we support you? Listen, share ideas, plant a garden, be the change you want to see in the world and it will be a better place for everyone.

What a beautiful way to end the interview. Thank you Renee. You have been such a source of ideas and encouragement. So true of you! 


Renee has a blog - http://mamachickensays.blogspot.com.au/

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As always I encourage you to leave comments and to keep the conversation going. And if you haven't subscribed to the blog you might like to. One of my hopes and desires is to see a vibrant simple living community grow here in blogger land.  

Peace and all good my friends,

Asta x

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